Money Talks
So Does Judgement
“That jacket is $465. That jacket is $465. That jacket is $465.”
Money is an unnamed apocalyptic language exchanged daily by several under the influence of insatiability. In my previous blog, I depicted hunger—the derivative of hunger results in success with humility. On the other hand, greed leads to success by insult, disrespect, deception, racism, self-serving, and all things not good; ergo, all good things come to an end. And you are left with loneliness because while you were seeking to grow rich, you ate the richness of humility, love, and respect. That is why countless rich people perish lonely or experience considerable stress while composing their will. In the end, they never developed trustworthy relations to pass on all the greed.
Nevertheless, the hungry now possess an entire shield of built-in trust, and they all appreciate they arrived there with integrity and humility.
It was the year 2000 and leather jackets were a fashionable trend. I recall at that time; I was incredibly proud of myself. I recently graduated honors from Stony Brook University while holding five jobs and studying strenuously. I immediately landed an excellent position as an analytical chemist with a pharmaceutical firm. And for the first time in my life, I never ought to worry where my next plate of food would come from. After working vigorously for years, I developed an innate skill to pay bills effortlessly and save liquid money on the side for emergencies and fun.
In this confident phase of my life, I was able to purchase all I desired. I am not intrigued by my credit card solicitations; ergo, I still am a full cash woman. If I can afford it, I'll buy it. If not, I won't. Simple as that.
Leather jackets were so in. Leather jackets exude confidence. Due to the bad boy vibe that it transmits, a leather jacket portrays the epitome of attractiveness, class, and confidence. No other clothing items hold the same timeless appeal that inspires trust and infers competence and toughness.
I yearned for a leather jacket for days, weeks, months; I checked stocks in Long Island, Staten Island, and New Jersey. Online shopping was not a widespread trend back then. I was so miniature and petite that even a size zero would drag on me. Weary of my search, yet never willing to give up, I contacted my friend in Virginia and said, 'I am coming this weekend, let's go check out the outlet shops, maybe I can find a leather jacket thats fits me there?'
I arrived late night Friday. Saturday, we were utterly exhausted walking for hours, checking and trying on leather jackets in every store. I said to my friend, 'sometimes being so small and skinny isn't so great ha ;p.'
Sunday morning, as I prepared to head back on a long despaired drive to New York, my friend and I hurriedly visited the mall near her home for a quick breakfast. I dressed in t-shirt and sweatpants with keds, (yes, they were a trend back then.) As we walked, I shockingly saw a mannequin in front and center of a store, wearing the perfect leather jacket from my peripheral vision. It was a store named 'Sisiley Paris.' I knew, hands down, this was going to be the one!
My friend and I looked at each other and screamed. Excitedly walking into the store, we were stopped by an older woman (probably late forties). She says, "Can I help you girls? Are you here for window shopping?"
Naive twenty-two-year-old me replied, "Oh hi mam, I would like to try on that leather jacket the mannequin is wearing." Suddenly her expression became stern and stunned. I remember it vividly till this very moment. And out of her mouth came out the words, "That jacket is $465. That jacket is $465. That jacket is $465."
I was both caught off guard and felt insulted. I kept my cool and replied, "Okay, may I please try it on?"
Again this woman, who stood tall and grounded with no smile and her hand's finger locked by her hips, picked up her right hand and pointed to the mannequin as she responded, "That jacket you see on the mannequin is 465 dollars."
Now I was livid. I desired to walk away, but I knew I fancied that jacket more than anything, and I further wished to take a jab at this woman's misjudgment. I sternly replied, "I heard you tell me the price over and over, now please take the darn jacket off the mannequin so I can try it on?"
As soon as that bad boy leather feel kissed my body, I felt as though I fulfilled another dream. It seemed like it was manufactured for me and expecting me. I instantly shouted, 'I'll take it full cash."
The sales lady, absolutely startled, and stuttering trembled the following words, "Oh how nice, let me show you some beautiful silk tops that will go perfect with it." She ended with a massive grin up to her brows and simultaneously whispered her commission in her head. I put my hand up in her face and said, 'No, thank you. I came in for the jacket I knew I wanted, and that is all I am taking from you."
I Got My Jacket!
Here tiny little me in NYC Penn Station holding my favorite jacket. Why was this my favorite? This jacket made me feel like, 'I did it.' I worked laboriously to save each dollar. I was able to purchase it without any guilt or buyer's remorse. I searched many states without giving up. In the end, it found me. I was underprivileged in previous years to hear about the law of attraction or to get what you want. I never give up. When I desire something, I try actively to attain it. If I cannot, I will save up for it. This twenty-two-year-old chic was happy this day, holding her accomplishment in her hands. No dream is too big or too small, especially when you do it all by yourself.
I narrate this story because this is the true face of this world. Humility is conquered by greed. Commission overlooks courtesy. This older woman thought two young girls dressed in cheap clothing could not afford such a jacket. Considerably twenty years ago, five hundred dollars for a coat was tremendously expensive. Some would say it still is.
And although I enjoyed putting her in her place, the entire incident was sad. Look around. This humiliation happens everywhere you go. If you are not presentable, not wealthy, a minority, or too young, you are treated as such. If the world weren't brainwashed and instead raised to treat each other kindly regardless of our image, the world would bow in honorable service.
FUNNY NOT SO FUNNY TRUE STORY
I adored this jacket. When I moved to Chicago, my belongings were all boxed up in my In-law's garage. When Zishan and I moved into our first apartment, (2004), we filled the second bedroom with all our boxes. I scanned through each box every night for this jacket. I looked over two hundred times. I felt worried, frustrated, bewildered, and in a void that my jacket I worked hard for somehow misplaced.
I never ceased searching. We bought our condo in 2006. Again, I would go through each box in my garage repeatedly in case I missed it. I was still concerned though not willing to give up. I believe it was either 2007 or 2008; I helped and packed up my In-law's house. It took hours, days, and weeks; every day, I would go and help clear out all the closets, armoires, drawers, pantry, and cabinets. One day I saw trash bags in my In-law master suite closet; I yelled out, "Mommy what are these bags doing here?" She replied they were stuff they no longer needed and were going to trash today. As I lifted the bags to move them aside, I saw through the hole near the tied trash knot a black leather jacket. I was like, NOOOOO, could it be? OMG, My Jacket was there the whole time! All those nights and years, I looked over and over, and here I was nearly about to lose it forever. Today this jacket is in my closet front and center as I first saw in the store. It stands as a constant reminder that I never gave up looking for it. TWICE!
Moneylism should be categorized as an actual disease. For money, cars, homes, jewelry, shoes, bags, vacations, hotels, lavish trips, people will abuse you and disrespect you. Whether because they possess it and you don't or because you possess it and they don't. Both scenarios are deceptive and full of greed. Earning a living is reasonable; putting yourself on the higher bar or someone else on a lower bar is a mental illness. Practice being humble.
These days many people are not whom you consider they are. They want your home, clothes, money, alcohol, jewelry, or even worse; they want to be you. Money makes certain people selfish and rude! Watch who your real friends, coworkers, and family are. Do they like you for what you possess? Do they hate you for what you don't possess? Why are you different when you are the same!
PIZZA INCIDENT
I once walked into a pizza store after work and was extremely exhausted this day. Oh, it was many, many years ago. The pizza man behind the counter would not even greet me, let alone take my order. He took orders of those who walked in after me. It was self-evident and pathetic. I was upset; the next day, I woke up thirty minutes earlier to look fantastic and go there again after work to see the difference in his demeanor. I blow-dried my hair, applied gorgeous makeup, and wore a trendy outfit. As soon as I opened that pizza store entrance door, the same man from yesterday did a double-take, almost dropped his pizza tray, and says, 'Hello beautiful, what would the lovely lady like?' I replied, "Nothing Asshole." and walked right back out!
Burberry Incident
It all began in 2003 when I fell in love with the classic Burberry scarf—priced at $400. Since I was not working much anymore, it took me nine years to invest and purchase the scarf I desired in 2003. I bought it in 2010 with zero regrets. I felt proud that once again, I accomplished a goal on my own. However long it took, I did it.
Alas, a sad woman stole my vintage Burberry scarf off my neck during my voyage to Paris in 2017. It stung a lot. Not because of materialism, yet because I worked carefully for it, and she took it away in nanoseconds.
The next Burberry purchase was in 2011. This story is similar to the leather jacket. I walked into Westchester mall in white plains with sneakers, sweats, no makeup, glasses, hair tied in a bun. As I walk in, no sales associate attended to me. When I asked for help, she instructed me to wait and see if someone was available. The sales associate returned with the words, "I'm sorry no one is available to help at the moment, would you like to purchase items online maybe?" Completely cognizant of what was happening, I chose to stay as I knew the associate would feel ashamed when I pop out my wad of cash.
I replied, "I drove here to buy a bag and I am not leaving without one." Suddenly her demeanor shifted, and she says, "Oh did you know which one, I can spare a few minutes." I placed the classic black and white Burberry Bag, matching wallet, an umbrella, and a wallet for my husband on the paying counter. The two store associates were making eye contact, implying I will walk away once I discover the total.
The total came out to a little over three grand. When I opened my old torn bag and took out the cash, the sales associate dropped her jaw and immediately started saying, "let me wrap these for you."
The next few years, whenever I walked into that store, it did not matter what I wore; she spoke to me very humbled (yet I knew she was far from it.) She knew I always possessed the cash and only showed up when equipped to execute a purchase.
My examples are of small purchases. This happens to people purchasing fancy homes, cars, estates, vacations all the time. If you don’t look the part, you do not receive treatment as such. We ought to change the mindset that what someone displays determines their bank account. And it all starts with you!
I own various extravagance items. Though on a mediocre day, you will never catch me in one. I acquire them for myself. It delivers me personal assurance that the girl, who at times didn't own seventy-five cents for a vending machine snickers bar as her dinner, can now purchase an article without asking for assistance.
Below are all articles I worked hard to attain. This is my personal pleasure, not to brag or be arrogant. The rest of my income goes towards my children’s desires and activities like Kung-Fu, clothes, Braces, Vacations. I work hard for my children and for myself. To provide them the privileges I did not experience and to be certain they never experience the suffering (no food) I did. However i teach my children the value of a dollar and no matter what we own, we ought to always be humble and grateful. Arrogance is ugly in any form.
Most of the time, I walk around in sweats and my old ten-dollar Barcelona souvenir bag. All that I own is not for display of my worth. I possess it for myself, my joy, and my sense of accomplishment. I do not buy a bag to impress. The only person I wish to impress is myself. I am not fond of the money greed ideology but rather the hunger for passion and hard work. Greed causes perplexities beyond belief, from minor, average incidents to catastrophic plans within the government and society in general. The rule of power and money is disturbing.
I love a simple life. Work hard, make honest earnings, spend where you wish. I believe money and greed blurs pure love, and so you forget family, become a workaholic, and ascertain friends within your status.
I hold friends that are both wealthy and poor. I love them all the same. Not a dollar gained or lost will ever change my love for them.
People are clever; they will pretend to be your greatest friend in three situations:
Colleagues/Bosses who act like your friend for the commission because you are good in sales. They provide you plenty of lip service. BEWARE! You should run a test and see if their behavior towards you changes. Protect yourself from users. I'm not implying to not be ambitious. But rather to know the difference between a false relationship based solely on monetary satisfaction only.
People that see all you possess and consequently want to be your best friend. Gold diggers come in all forms. They know who they are when they look in the mirror yet will never admit it. Be careful. If you notice them acting off, most likely your instinct is correct.
People act nice to you till they become wealthy. Then either they grew in greed, or you are not worth their time. And we all know from infinite social media inspirational quotes, 'NO MATTER WHAT, YOU ARE ALWAYS WORTH IT.'
I’ve seen this ugly transformation too many times:
A close friend was very kind when I met her. At the time, I lived on the second floor of a home in an affordable area. Her husband was studying to become a pathologist. The day he got his degree, she never spoke to me again.
A best friend lived through small rooms and eventually a small two-bedroom home. When she moved to Texas, her dollar value increased, so now she could afford a bigger house. She was not happy with her gigantic new home and desired a more extensive and more modern place, and apparently, I was no longer her friend. I went to visit her to spend quality time. Her words to me after ten years of friendship, "What makes you my best friend, what have you done for me?" I could see she was brainwashed with money. I equally felt repulsive after that comment and happily walked away.
A girl who didn't come from a wealthy family was sad because she needed more money for her wedding decor. She was sad and upset and knew money didn't come easy two days before her wedding. The day after she married, her attitude was higher than Mount Everest
People that google the price of other people’s home or purchases. Extremely nosy and disgusting behavior. What does what someone else owns have to do with you?
These are a few examples. It happens to many people. Is money the root of all evil, or are evil people the source of evil? Money disrespects, breaks relationships, and is even the cause of many tragic deaths. I kindly request for you to be cognizant of your mentality, your actions and the actions of those around you. Just as oil and water don’t mix, neither can greed and giving. Which one are you?
How often are you assessed by what you wear, drive, where you live? For all you know, the person next door could be amidst a foreclosure, filing for bankruptcy, jacking purchases on their credit card. On the contrary, the person with scuffed shoes does possess secure funds. Not in all cases, yet the possibility does exist. Thus be kind to all, not because of what they own. A person is valuable just for being part of this universe, not part of your monetary enjoyment. MONEY TALKS BULLSHIT!
Humbly Yours,
