Placebo on the GO
Coping Manifesto
“When theres nowhere to go; do not faux. Be in the know and outgrow.
-Aneela K.”
Let's not kid ourselves. It's been one challenging fucking year for us all. Whether you suffered a job loss, less income, a shattered relationship, lost a home, or especially a loved one, this preceding year's coping shit was turbulent. And even if you were so fortunate to losing nothing, you most probably experienced second-hand stress, exhaustion, or tired of the same shit the same day during this long-drawn pandemic.
So what are you going to do about it? What were unusual ways you coped through your anxieties and troubles?
Sorrowfully we lost a genuinely close friend two days back due to a sudden heart attack. He was an honorable man, and his world is astounded to see him go at age 44, leaving behind a beautiful wife, three young kids, and an entire population that admired him so.
Our initial reaction was shock, trauma, disbelief, weeping, and deep grief. Though you see, with age comes intuitive wisdom. The mind automatically grows. If you lost a friend in their forties, you are most likely yourself a peer of forties. Ergo it's unquestionable you can distinguish your likes and dislikes.
Do you like being gloomy, overthinking, continuously bellowing till you feel feeble? Of course not. No one does. Our gut reaction will authorize us to our weakest phase. And it's okay to be there for a bit. Following your mind identifies you are capable of standing tall. So it will execute you to crave things that make you feel good.
This good feeling is what I refer to as a 'Placebo on the Go.' Virtually it's your coping method. Many times like magnets, we attract to things that make us feel good. Your body is cognizant of your obligation to heal. Please take advantage of this feeling and regulate it before it controls the selections you make.
For example, a prevalent coping mechanism is comfort food. When people are anxious, many look to binge and stress eat, which is fine. Choose one item as your Placebo and enjoy it for a limited time.
I am completely in touch with my mind, body, and soul; ergo, I acknowledge each act. I can sense if I am performing a good choice or a poor choice. Suppose I choose my Placebo as a poor choice; I do it willingly and without any guilt. What is the point of a Placebo if you are adding accountability to the mix? It will then only become counterproductive.
PLACEBO ONE
However, what I do is calculate a specific time limit. This week I took a bag of chips, not the most unhealthy ones, and maybe not the most healthy. In my head, I said, 'Aneela have some tonight and then be done with it.' So that's what I did. I used the chips as a justification for a few hours to heal my melancholy. Now I was done with that Placebo, and I moved on to eating fresh veggies and salad for my comfort food.
PLACEBO TWO
Next, I know my new fireplace brings me solace. So I used this as Placebo number two. I continuously left the fire on day or night to remind me of what feeling good is. I stayed positive, knowing I'll need to purchase more firewood later for a plumbing renovation. I received a random message from a lovely woman in our neighborhood who generously offered us some wood! Thanks, Birva!
PLACEBO THREE
A past placebo I used as a young teen. I made a third piercing in my ear. Many years passed since I used that hole; accordingly, it sealed. I grabbed some ice, healing ointment, a sharp earring, and I pushed through the pain. I was happy to see another stud in my ear. It will serve as a reminder of my friend as it glistens daily.
I recognize these are all trivial fixes to heal something profound. However, performing any one task for a long extended time won't help you. Eventually, you will get jaded, give up, or not feel challenged. I feel much better. Of course, I am heartbroken that our friend is no longer. However, I recaptured my strength by this coping tactic I've been exercising since I was a teen. Trust me, IT WORKS!
Maybe for you, it's working out, cooking new recipes, reading books, calling a friend, praying, taking in nature, or anything else your mind knows you enjoy. However, whatever it is. Keep it short and keep it ever-changing to keep it thrilling.
The point of the Placebo is that they are small acts of kindness to yourself. You are healing and allowing yourself temporary healing through authentic joy. Amid these Placebo's, if you smile, do not feel guilty. It's a healthy sign. You understand that shit happened, and although tragic it was, you cannot lose sight of yourself, and life must go on. It has to. You cannot just give up. How will you benefit from giving up?
Don't stay with one Placebo; keep it healthy by choosing small placebos and continuously swapping them for new mini pleasures.
If your body isn't ready to do anything comprehensive, don't. However, you can do small acts that will get you out of the feeling unhappy rut.
Retail therapy, repairing old relationships, intimacy, comfort food, Netflix, music, dancing, driving, socializing are a few that are small placebos to get over a big issue. If you try these instead of avoiding them, you will heal much faster and bounce back to yourself in no time.
In the end, you learned that you combined all your feelings and knowledge of self to self-help through a tragedy. And in the future, you will be better for it.
By not letting your pain grow, you grew! CONGRATULATIONS. Now make your Placebo list and keep it handy so the next time, an emotional placebo in need is growth indeed.
Your Placebo for the Week,
ANEELA K.
Below is a model of more intense strategies if the ‘placebo strategy’ isn’t enough to get you by and reacquire yourself.
