PROVE or IMPROVE
Choice is YOURS
“Let the improvement of yourself keep you so busy that you have no time to criticize others.”
Choose Wisely. Most of us find ourselves on the defense, and we cripple our way out of it by proving ourselves. We are so stuck on clearing our version and perception that we create our stagnant black hole.
What would be the outcome if you were not concerned about constantly proving yourself? Allow me to enlighten you here; the amount of headspace you give to people who continuously require you to prove yourself is highly unnecessary and quite harmful to your overall well-being.
Use time efficiently
Instead of discussing the story over and over, use this time to meditate, let go and move on.
Use your energy efficiently
It's exhausting to hear the noise in your head continually. The sadness and anger grow stronger with noise, and all this unnecessary negative thinking is tiring your brain cells and causing you to feel fatigued and hold low energy for moments of joy or tasks that require your whole physical being to be in the moment.
Use your words efficiently
Rather than repeating your defensive remarks in a hundred different ways, use words of affirmation for yourself and learn to adapt and grow. It is far more profitable to elevate your mindfulness than to sulk in negative tension. Remove yourself from those that can't bring you peace.
it’s not your job
It is not your job to fix everyone; you can talk an ear off to someone to change, though if they are not willing to, and you cannot budge their pride status, they are insecure. Now it is time for you to realize the difference between deep insecurity that requires a superior feel, and vulnerability that makes you feel like you have to explain your actions repeatedly.
Let it be known that you do not have to do that. And even if you are the bigger person and apologize for something you did not do, feel confident knowing that you did not have to prove yourself to losers.
Anyone who remotely respects you would be cautious in how they speak to you; those who disrespect you are not disrespecting you; in fact, they are disrespecting themselves by showing their chosen words, actions and feel they are better than you.
No one is better than anyone else. We all hold flaws, and we all carry our traumas. Wouldn't the world be more content if we conveyed more empathy rather than being fixated on proving others wrong?
For those always pointing fingers, I suggest you improve yourself.
Improve yourself
The more you work on self-growth and improvement, the less tension you hold. Because it is never about you, the way others behave is primarily about themselves. Therefore stop wasting time thinking about them, feeling sad and focus on your growth and improvements.
Use the extra time and energy to:
1. Meditate.
2. Learn a new skill.
3. Educate yourself on a topic you always had hunger for.
4. Read more, especially self-help books
5. Exercise even fifteen minutes a day is statistically proven to better your thoughts.
6. Socialize with those who love you for who you are as you are.
7. Therapeutic activities such as cooking, gardening, painting, walking, playing with animals or any activity you find relaxing.
There is so much more to you. Don't you wish to see a better version of yourself year after year? Do you want to be a mirror image of disappointment? Or if you look back at people you knew for decades and they still behave the same with their stubbornness and righteousness, what did they learn or improve about themselves?
Break out from the web of the previous generation; a stubborn attitude is no less harmful than a virus. Stay clear and safe away from a mind that enjoys causing rivalry, misery, and all that is not positive. You are better than that; the choice is yours, prove prove, prove, or improve.
About me:
I had to prove myself since age ten; when I lost my mom, and my father was no longer in the picture. I got so caught up in proving why I deserve the same loving treatment as others who have parents. It became a battle of fairness. Through the many terrible years, I learned that life is never fair; we are all given different cards to deal with.
Though because I became acclimated to defending my worth and value, it became a part of my personality, also known as fight or flight mode.
Much recently (2020), I became exhausted and tired of this life. Many thought I gave in or gave up defending myself. It's not that I gave up; I grew up! It is no longer worth my time, energy, health, words, or honestly anything to succumb to the insecure needs of others by falling into their redundant need for drama. If people don't know how to stay out of your business, walk away. Let them talk, scream, say immature, foolish comments, and be passive-aggressive. None of this says anything about who you are. It says more about them. They are just defining themselves.
They can hide their actual image/reputation behind social media, maybe even in public, though you can't fake who you are forever and or in front of God. The day will come when you must repent for the unnecessary sadness you caused on those who did not wish harm on you.
I don't need to do anything; I let life be. The best revenge is to live a good life. By the grace of God, many of my dreams have come to fruition, and I have many more that i know will too. I will not be unwise and waste my time trying to prove myself to anyone. If you knew me for a while and didn't understand me, that's too bad. It's more than okay to go separate ways. No harm done. It is healthier to be around those that love you, encourage you, inspire you, and wish to see you improve. Without being condescending, passive-aggressive, excluding you, or thinking they are better than you.
A wise human being knows we all go through ups and downs. Anyone who truly loves you for whom you are will not walk away or ask you to prove yourself. If they leave you when you are down, it says a lot about their values and standards; if they are absent when you are happy, it says a lot about their shortcoming in sharing the joys of others.
Please know we live in a world with seven billion people. If a few are rude and quite frankly a piece of shit to you for the longest time, what are you doing?
Walk away and work on fixing the damage done by miserable people. You have the right to better yourself every second, minute hour of the day.
To be the best version of you possible, never stop improving because this is not about pleasing anyone else, proving to anyone else; it is only about improving yourself.
If you improve by 1 % every day, within a year you'll have improved by 365 %
Improving Daily,
