The Story of The Stye
True Story
“Acceptance is not a passive state, rather it is a positive force, that helps us to grow, be better.”
A cold, crisp morning, March 2, 2022, made you feel fresh and ready for what the day will bring. My luggage shines with flare, prepared to be aboard a new beginning of building new memories. I was just three months in recovery after a horrid year of pain. Knowing my surgery and undergoing procedures went well, a part of me was intrigued by what came next now. It had been so long since I was pain-free that I was almost shocked that I was living without pain. The past year taught me much about life in general, though from an angle I honestly never noticed early.
I take my seat on the plane with a blessed smile. Through my previous travels, I experienced dust in seats in a manner where one can assume they have not been tended to. In my item bag, I carry my essentials, a toothbrush, toothpaste, a hair scrunch, contact lens solution, and allergy pills.
About fifteen minutes into the flight, I felt debris in my left eye. Immediately I grab my contact lens solution, remove the contact from my left eye, clean it thoroughly, and place it back. To my surprise, the discomfort remained the same. Once again, I tried to give my contact a deep clean, but it did nothing. At this point, I decided to wait for the flight's arrival and take a deep look at it in the airport washroom. The rest of the flight was a test of my patience.
After landing and grabbing my favorite of all travel suitcases, I headed towards the washroom and noticed that now my left eye was quite evidently irritated. I assumed it was my makeup liner and when about my plans.
The following day I woke up with an odd feeling in my left eye. The kind you can visualize prior to reflection. I rushed to the bathroom mirror and saw a largely swollen lid with a tender bump right by my lash line. My initial reaction was to stay calm, breathe and not let it get in the way of my vacation. I went about my day positively and didn't think about it. After the previous year of horrific pain I dealt with; this pain seemed minute. I came home that evening, and while gently washing my face, I realized it hurt more than expected. I let it be, indulged in my peaceful nightly prayers, and was sound asleep in minutes.
The following day I awoke to a swelling that had tripled during the night, and I decided to leave it and not wear any eye makeup for the rest of the trip. Upon my return, I visited my favorite primary care doctor, Dr. Walsh. For an eighty-year-old man, I can assure you his experience and wisdom is far more reassuring than many go-by-the-book doctors. Dr. Walsh confirmed it was a 'stye' and its reason for appearing can be ambiguous as there are copious variants. He offered to pop it or suggested I wait it out. He stated, "If I pop the stye, it would naturally bleed." As he could see the veins in it and followed up with, "it may leave a scar." We both agreed to wait. He encouraged warm compression on the lid three times a day.
Following his medical instructions, the significant swelling around the stye did settle down. Although the stye was still there, it was more tender than ever. Some days went by where it was redder, others may be more bubbly, and somewhere it would enlarge itself. It almost felt like it had a mind of its own.
About ten weeks after its initial appearance, I almost forgot it existed. I rarely mentioned it to anyone. Any audience is polite enough not to say, "Hey, you have a big bump on your eyelid." Why would they? It's not like I couldn't miss it. I only noticed it when I sat each morning for makeup application and when I would wash my face as my evening routine.
When I looked it up; Google mentioned that a stye could take up to 7-10 days or can stay indefinitely.
After experiencing one of the most challenging years of my life, I would not let an unidentified stye take away from me what I worked tenaciously to rebuild. My pain taught me resilience; patience delivered me hope and placed in perspective what is far more critical than how our face looks. The greatest gift I acquired from the pain was learning true acceptance. It was not easy, but it was the only thing that kept me sane in the end.
I accepted the stye. I considered that if it were here to stay, it would remain and be it as it is. I am okay with it! So rather than being upset or uncomfortable with this stye, in month three, we became friends.
I pass with every wash and brush stroke with tender love and care. I knew this was the new me. I told the stye, "we can grow together until you are ready to go."
We are now at month seven with the stye on my left eye. About two weeks ago, it shed off a somewhat painful layer. I almost felt sad it was shedding. It has become an important daily reminder of my patience, strength, and real priorities. I recall a time nearly into month four when I lost all my lashes around that stye. I said, 'it's okay; they will grow back. I am still young and beautiful despite a few lashes missing in one area."
In the latest update, the stye is now a minor bump. Fresh new lashes are regrowing in the area surrounding it. Also, it does not hurt as much. Without makeup, some may not even notice it. It practically looks like a crunched-up wrinkle on my lid. Will it stay this way forever? Will it go away eventually? I don't know. I don't care.
The most important takeaway from the story of the stye is that, by accepting it, I did not allow it to direct my emotions; instead, I kept my feelings in control. I did not wake up infuriated every day that it was still there. I kept my cool whenever I saw it. I was not bitter that my precious eyes had an unusual bump on them. I was okay with it. I did not express it to anyone; even my family members barely knew this story. It was a test given to me by the grace of god to practice patience, learn the true meaning of acceptance, keep my emotions in check, and demonstrate that my gratitude for a chronic pain-free life was not rescinded because of a stye.
My dear readers, I share my story with you so that you can take from it what you need and know that there is more to life than our physical features, and even when our health is affected, we must not relinquish hope. Practice daily to stay strong. Believe in yourself and your worth. Accepting who you are is the most extraordinary gift life can offer you. All our problems are here to test our patience. My stye is still here with me. If I took an educated guess, I would consider for it to stay another six months. It is currently a hard textured surface tiny bump now. But no harm done.
The year 2022 was an eye-opener in considerable regard. The story of the stye conveyed performance growth to me. The most incredible is to clarify what has realized my highest priority by accepting who we are, not what we are.
An iconic example of strength reminds me of Frida Kahlo, a young woman who was injured severely during her medical studies, and she was determined to help people feel better. While she lay in bed for months during recovery, she painted passionately and became one of the most remarkable women influencers to be known for her paintings, fashion, and ambition. No matter what she went through, even a difficult marriage and divorce, she continuously accepted herself and never gave up on being the best version of herself.
My most tremendous hunger is to leave behind a legacy that we should love who we are, regardless of stressors that come along the way and what we have or don't have. Bad or good, you keep going. You keep driving yourself to accept who you are.
2021 was so tremendously painful, but today, 2022, I witness my strengths; I practice them daily, and I love who I am, with or without a stye on my face.
Acceptance is key to be truly free,
