The Good, The Bad &
The BEAUTIFUL
“No object is so beautiful that, under certain conditions, it will not look ugly.
”
The premise of this blog is to redirect those that make judgements based on outer appearance (positively/negatively) and their potential, without taking a deeper look at the true essence of beauty that lies within all of us. Lets begin with how the world has shaped us to believe in true beauty by mathematical logic called the ‘Golden Ratio’.
THE GOLDEN RATIO OF A BEAUTIFUL FACE
“Wherever there is number, there is beauty.” – Proclus, Greek philosopher
What makes a face beautiful? Perfect skin? Big eyes? A large smile? All these play a role, but in the aesthetics industry the answer is a mathematical ratio, dating back 2,500 years.
Some 2,500 years ago, in Ancient Greece, it was discovered that when a line is divided into two parts in a ratio of 1: 1.618, it creates an appealing proportion. This ratio is known as the golden ratio, the divine proportion or phi (named after Phidias, a Greek sculptor and mathematician who used this ratio when designing sculptures).
Since the Renaissance period, artists like Botticelli and Leonardo Da Vinci have used the golden ration in the sketching of their paintings, such as Monalisa or Birth of Venus. During modern times, the golden ratio has been applied to facial beauty and adopted as a guideline for aesthetic treatments.
We may be unaware of it but we subconsciously judge beauty by facial symmetry and proportion. Cross-cultural research has shown that no matter the ethnicity, our perception of beauty is based on the ratio proportions of 1.618. As the face comes closer to this ratio, it is perceived as more beautiful. As an example, the ideal ratio of the top of the head to the chin versus the width of the head should be 1.618.
This ratio is used to mark out the ideal proportions on a patient’s face and aesthetic enhancements that ignore phi may make patients look worse.
How do we use the golden ratio to measure the ideal facial proportions?
the distance from the top of the nose to the centre of the lips should be 1.618 times the distance from the centre of the lips to the chin
the hairline to the upper eyelid should be 1.618 times the length of the top of the upper eyebrow to the lower eyelid.
the ideal ratio of upper to lower lip volume is 1:1.6 (the lower lip should have slightly more volume than the upper lip)
FACIAL SYMMETRY
Here are images of my daughters and my facial symmetry from our braces initial consultation.
Fluctuating asymmetry is the non-systematic variation of individual facial landmarks for the facial midline, i.e., the line perpendicular to the line through the eyes, which crosses the tip of the nose and the chin.
Scientists used various methods to examine the claim that facial symmetry plays a role in judgments of beauty. Blending of multiple faces to create a composite and face-half mirroring have been among the techniques used.
Facial symmetry has been found to increase ratings of attractiveness in human faces. More symmetrical faces are perceived as more attractive in both males and females, although facial symmetry plays a larger role in judgments of attractiveness concerning female faces.
AGING:
Facial symmetry is also a valid marker of cognitive aging. Progressive changes occurring throughout life in the soft tissues of the face will cause more prominent facial asymmetry in older faces. Therefore, symmetrical transformation of older faces generally increases their attractiveness while symmetrical transformation in young adults and children will decrease their attractiveness.Males with more symmetric faces in old age have higher intelligence and are more efficient at information processing than males with less symmetric faces.
Research indicates that facial symmetry is correlated with the 'big-five' model of personality. The five factors are:
Openness to experience (inventive/curious vs. consistent/cautious)
Conscientiousness (efficient/organized vs. easy-going/careless)
Extraversion (outgoing/energetic vs. solitary/reserved)
Agreeableness (friendly/compassionate vs. challenging/detached)
Neuroticism (sensitive/nervous vs. secure/confident)
A consistent finding is that facial symmetry is positively correlated with extraversion, indicating that individuals with more symmetric faces are also more extroverted. More symmetrical faces are judged to be lower on neuroticism but higher on conscientiousness and agreeableness (Data reports again placed asymmetrical faces rated as less agreeable than normal ones, but the more symmetrical somewhat less agreeable than the normal). More symmetrical faces are also more likely to have more desirable social attributes assigned to them, such as sociable, intelligent, or lively.
However, the relationship between facial symmetry and the 'big-five personality model remains somewhat unclear about neuroticism, openness, agreeableness, and conscientiousness. Openness and agreeableness appear to be significantly negatively related to facial symmetry, while neuroticism and conscientiousness do not seem to link to facial symmetry. Concerning trustworthiness, they found that the facial muscles become imbalanced when lying.
I Hate to Admit it, but Beauty Is Intimidating
Now that we learned a bit about facial symmetry's correlation to judgment or how attractive one is and maybe perceived to affect personality,— let's put that aside for a moment and address norms IRL.
Frankly, ' beauty' is over-rated. How frequently do we hear, "Omg how did that fugly woman get such an attractive guy?" Well, ladies, that's because the 'Handsome' guy wasn't as superficial as you perceived!
And that's the truth. Although many people are nervous about communicating, intimidated by confidence, threatened by the desirable physique, you couldn't be further from the truth concerning good-looking people. Most beautiful people feel singled out or treated adversely by those around them who feel overawed by their beauty. If your nodding your head, then it's happened to you, or you may be guilty of feeling threatened by their beauty. Beautiful people (I should choose a more suitable adjective, though for the blog, let's stick with it) are as regular as you are. They eat, poop, and sleep as you do.
The impression here is more profound than external beauty. The truth is, the outer beauty promotes inner confidence and self-love (for the majority). Those who comprehend it seem gorgeous, confident, extroverted, and considered a threat.
Beautiful, kind-hearted, intelligent, skilled people who hold great potential get treated poorly. Numerous women or even males are insecure, anxious, troubled, and can't handle this confidence; attractive people prevail so effortlessly. Instead of showing they like this beautiful person, they consider them as a threat and feel intimidated. Instead of befriending, they will stalk them on social media, execute derogatory remarks, and even go as far as feeling more immeasurable about themselves by constantly putting down or insulting others they find intimidating. Be cautious. Sometimes it's the closest friends/family who are commonly threatened by beauty and success. Because they observe the ideal life and good fortune coming your way, rather than supporting, they feel sorry for themselves, and they will commit a disgraceful act to try and wreck your day. It may be a silly little comment or a continuum of many negative observations, always saying 'no.' And a terrifying thought is that they are not cognizant of their behavior. That is because, for them, it's a habitual way to self-soothe. It's nearly discrete bullying. Now that's a terrifying thought.
Let's use Facebook as an example. How often does a Facebook friend post lovely comments on your images, but IRL, they never text, call, message, or even care to ask what you may be going through? You could be undergoing a significant struggle, and they only appear as your friend in public, so they hold proof on social media that they show their concern. Authentic friends pick up the phone and call or text or maybe even send a private message.
Beautiful people are criticized for actions they never did. For malicious intentions, they never held. They often get singled out for no apparent purpose except that they are gorgeous and firmly carry it.
I've been there, and countless people stare me down with an uncanny expression the second I walk in. I presumed I did something. It turns out I did. I showed up with self-love and confidence.
There was an incident once where I looked fabulous. Head to toe. My hair was bouncing with cloud nine joy; my drip was unique and quite attractive, accented by leather. My heels were complimenting my confident walk. As I strolled into the room, all eyes and heads turned so far away they could have injured their neck hehe ;p I was reassured I looked hot af and went on beaming about my day.
If you feel you look fabulous and your good friend or family doesn't state a word, trust me, they are not blind; they are threatened. Alas, you can't change them all. If only they knew what you know. 'There is need to compete; you can win too!'
I've walked into places with several women who immediately stare at me, I give friendly smiles, yet they ignore me. I used to doubt myself; what did I do? Until I figured it out, and now I am more like, 'Bye Felicia'!
How Media Portrays Beauty
Media Influence on external beauty doesn't benefit. Countless people follow other beautiful figures and live life through them vicariously. If you ponder, that is truly very sad. You see, repeated sponsored posts all over media urging you to look more desirable. It's shifted into making your hair look good, expensive skincare, and purchasing the most becoming clothes, bags, and shoes. Show me how many of these actions will capture you, a person that will continue to love you when your skin starts to sag, new shoes get scuffed, bags get worn out when your roots grow gray.
I understand; you desire to look presentable: which is fine. However, if you believe you are any less beautiful without all these additions, you have more critical issues.
My Genuine Perspective
As a Makeup Educator/Spa Therapist, I will be the first to inform you; makeup is artistic. I am a talented artist that creates symmetry. Accordingly, my profession is continuously flourishing. But wait, hold that thought for a second; although balance is attractive, I find the naked canvas even more appealing. Anyone can wipe makeup off; it's a temporary glamour appeal. Permanent is the real You. So while you appreciate the glam, it is critical that you cherish who you are from within and externally. Do not compare yourself to others. More importantly, if you see a beautiful woman, don't be shy or rude. Instead, tell her, 'You are Beautiful.' I guarantee you will be surprised with how different they behave from what you imagined.
After serving thousands of women, I've come to adore the pure and genuine soul before working my art on them. As a routine part of my makeup applications, I ask women to come with a clean face. And same goes for my facial requirements. Ergo I see the natural person, and I connect with each woman on a deeper level because, for me, it is the beauty within that surpasses any additional symmetry or a facial glow I supplement.
Alas, it doesn't stop at physical attractiveness. People are intimidated by your grit, ambition, energy, passion, intellect, aptitude, talents, skills, career, financial status, home, and even your relationship with others. It's a scary world out there. For those of you that feel confident, be cautious not to overtrust the wrong people. In most cases, it is probably a friend/family you trusted. For those that feel insecure, read some self-help books, seek therapy, change your thought process, and remember all the while not to display arrogance because that is by far the farthest attribute from what most people consider attractive. Vanity has a place of its own; the trash. Be nice, be supportive, be kind, and most of all, stay humble and sincere. If you are a good friend, I promise you they will be an even greater friend to you. A relationship is gratifying when both parties acknowledge their differences yet still find each other beautiful through the differences and sincerity.
If you let your guard down and not feel insecure, you too will feel beautiful, trust me. You will appreciate the relationship with other people, regardless of whether you believe they are better-looking than you.
When I see a good-looking woman, I feel entirely awed. I exhibit an inspiration through my soul, and automatically as a natural reflex, I utter the words, "OMG you are so beautiful mashallah." and 100% of them welcome it. Do not be intimidated by beauty, but instead discover who they are, and you will see their most authentic beauty is from within.
In closing, I would like to make a suggestion. The next time a beautiful person walks into a room and is standing there awkwardly (or you may not think so), go over and introduce yourself. Please understand that beauty doesn't take away from feeling uncomfortable and isolated.
For those gone…
Note* If you wonder why I stepped away and went in a different direction: I noticed you were intimidated by my happiness, and I do not welcome any negativity.
If you steered away because you thought it was me that was intimidated: I am so sorry you missed out on a genuine relationship; I am a do-or-die kind of friend. Beauty is both secondary and irrelevant. If your attitude isn't for a healthy relationship, then 'Sayonara Dear.' No one should be in a toxic relationship.
Health is wealth
Beauty is within
Life is short
Make it Sweet
Be Yourself
Who Says
(This was the song I used for motivation when I started my own career a decade ago; many friends, best friends, and even close family members tried to anonymously discourage me, insult me, taunt me, but I never gave up because… “Who Says”…. Go Get’em Tiger)
Beautifully Yours,
ANEELA K.
Friends/Family Who Find Me Beautiful within and I Find Them Beautiful within:
Sofia, Anelle, Cori, Amber, Anitha, Guari, Neha, Tabassum, Saba, Hila, Yas, Sabrina, Rahila, Julia, Danielle, Adriana, Jessica, Jennifer, Aalia, Samiyah, Sehrish, Coreen, Monique, Safiya, Farhana, Iram, Irim, Amena, Tashina, Penelope, Chanda, Melissa, Diana, Kim, Lisa, Caitlyn, Vijaya, Surekha, Divya, Jameela, Nabeela, Shakila, Freha, Siobhan, Heena, Pina, Peggy, Stasha, Mehek, Amy, Sarah, Shazia, Seleste, Farah, Emily, Angela, Rosa…. and the list goes on. I haven’t even included my beautiful male friends… (Asif, Dentonio, Leon, JJ, Sanjeev, Hafiz, Rameez, Fabiano, Ali, Jarrett, Joel, Sean, Omair, Bob, Ashok, Atif, Kamil, Janis, Salman, Zain, Kenn, Waqas, Kuku, Awais, Marcelo, Mehtab, Zaid, Waseem) The more genuine you are, the more loving people will surround you. That’s not my opinion. IT’s a FACT, and I’m LIVING PROOF of it. So stop feeling envious, insecure and open your heart and eyes to the beauty that surrounds. Life is short, don’t make it any shorter, but rather sweeter!
